It's me. Hi.

Some days we look at ourselves and recognize all of the changes in our faces. We see things others don't see. 

The number of times I've been told *you haven't changed a bit* ... I laugh and laugh and ... whew. 

But it's okay. It's okay to see changes.

 
It's okay to see the crows' feet. The laugh lines (I know they're supposedly the same thing, but still!). The forehead wrinkles (WTH with these, y'all? Is it just me?) (See also, is it time for bangs? Because I'm terrified of those!). The neck hairs (Guys. Not chin hairs, NECK. Nobody warned me about these!).

 
It's okay to need to lift your glasses up high on your head and pull your phone closer so you can read what's in front of you. It's okay to have them sit completely on the tip of your nose so you can try to look over them. And it's okay to do those same movements when you're wearing your contact lenses and think - oh, shit, well that's not great.

 
It's okay to wonder if your hair is growing more slowly, turning different shades on you. Maybe even feeling like the texture is changing (personally, I'm noticing more waves, like back when I was a teenager!).

It's okay to fight night sweats and wonder why you're wearing different pajamas every damned night. And why your skin feels softer, rougher, tighter, squishier.

I see more of my mother and father in me every day (I love you, Momma!) and treasure every crinkle and every smile that reminds me of who I come from.

We're allowed to age. We want to, even.

However gracefully or not; however happily or not; however difficult it may seem on any given day. The changes in our body, our minds, make us who we are.

 
I hope you're feeling good as you are. I hope you can see the joy others see in your smile. That they (we!) hear in your laugh. The heart we see in your tears.

 
I hope you find strength in the acceptance of others and it enables you to accept yourself.

 
It can be a battle, but I'm hopeful that for many of us it becomes more of the norm.

 

As for me, I remind myself that 50 can be fun and fabulous (it's not my birthday, I am approaching 50-1/2!). It can be tough and achy. And it can be all those things at once.

 
But it's where I am these days. 

And I'm going to work at enjoying as many moments as possible. Each day, night, all of the laughter, tears, breaths.

All of them.

 
It's me. Hi.

 
I'm actually *not* the problem.

And neither are you. 

 
{If you don't get that we need to talk!}

Tweet